local command = 'slap [target]' local doc = [[``` /slap [target] Slap somebody. ```]] local triggers = { '^/slap[@'..bot.username..']*' } local slaps = { '$victim was shot by $victor.', '$victim was pricked to death.', '$victim walked into a cactus while trying to escape $victor.', '$victim drowned.', '$victim drowned whilst trying to escape $victor.', '$victim blew up.', '$victim was blown up by $victor.', '$victim hit the ground too hard.', '$victim fell from a high place.', '$victim fell off a ladder.', '$victim fell into a patch of cacti.', '$victim was doomed to fall by $victor.', '$victim was blown from a high place by $victor.', '$victim was squashed by a falling anvil.', '$victim went up in flames.', '$victim burned to death.', '$victim was burnt to a crisp whilst fighting $victor.', '$victim walked into a fire whilst fighting $victor.', '$victim tried to swim in lava.', '$victim tried to swim in lava while trying to escape $victor.', '$victim was struck by lightning.', '$victim was slain by $victor.', '$victim got finished off by $victor.', '$victim was killed by magic.', '$victim was killed by $victor using magic.', '$victim starved to death.', '$victim suffocated in a wall.', '$victim fell out of the world.', '$victim was knocked into the void by $victor.', '$victim withered away.', '$victim was pummeled by $victor.', '$victim was fragged by $victor.', '$victim was desynchronized.', '$victim was wasted.', '$victim was busted.', '$victim\'s bones are scraped clean by the desolate wind.', '$victim has died of dysentery.', '$victim fainted.', '$victim is out of usable Pokemon! $victim whited out!', '$victim is out of usable Pokemon! $victim blacked out!', '$victim whited out!', '$victim blacked out!', '$victim says goodbye to this cruel world.', '$victim got rekt.', '$victim was sawn in half by $victor.', '$victim died. I blame $victor.', '$victim was axe-murdered by $victor.', '$victim\'s melon was split by $victor.', '$victim was slice and diced by $victor.', '$victim was split from crotch to sternum by $victor.', '$victim\'s death put another notch in $victor\'s axe.', '$victim died impossibly!', '$victim died from $victor\'s mysterious tropical disease.', '$victim escaped infection by dying.', '$victim played hot-potato with a grenade.', '$victim was knifed by $victor.', '$victim fell on his sword.', '$victim ate a grenade.', '$victim practiced being $victor\'s clay pigeon.', '$victim is what\'s for dinner!', '$victim was terminated by $victor.', '$victim was shot before being thrown out of a plane.', '$victim was not invincible.', '$victim has encountered an error.', '$victim died and reincarnated as a goat.', '$victor threw $victim off a building.', '$victim is sleeping with the fishes.', '$victim got a premature burial.', '$victor replaced all of $victim\'s music with Nickelback.', '$victor spammed $victim\'s email.', '$victor made $victim a knuckle sandwich.', '$victor slapped $victim with pure nothing.', '$victor hit $victim with a small, interstellar spaceship.', '$victim was quickscoped by $victor.', '$victor put $victim in check-mate.', '$victor RSA-encrypted $victim and deleted the private key.', '$victor put $victim in the friendzone.', '$victor slaps $victim with a DMCA takedown request!', '$victim became a corpse blanket for $victor.', 'Death is when the monsters get you. Death comes for $victim.', 'Cowards die many times before their death. $victim never tasted death but once.' } local action = function(msg) local nicks = load_data('nicknames.json') local victim = msg.text:input() if msg.reply_to_message then if nicks[tostring(msg.reply_to_message.from.id)] then victim = nicks[tostring(msg.reply_to_message.from.id)] else victim = msg.reply_to_message.from.first_name end end local victor = msg.from.first_name if nicks[msg.from.id_str] then victor = nicks[msg.from.id_str] end if not victim then victim = victor victor = bot.first_name end local message = slaps[math.random(#slaps)] message = message:gsub('$victim', victim) message = message:gsub('$victor', victor) sendMessage(msg.chat.id, message) end return { action = action, triggers = triggers, doc = doc, command = command }